singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
