Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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