I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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