I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
