So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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