i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
