he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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