even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
