Already got asked if we're dating
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
