Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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