That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
we're making bets on your personal life
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
