Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
