is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
