Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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