Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
