ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize