Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
