Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
