i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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