I got chris browned last night
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
