You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
