Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
