There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize