Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
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