I'm going to jail i love you
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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