you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
