For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
