I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Randomize
