Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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