i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
