yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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