I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
