Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
A bitchslap is in order.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize