so let's talk penis.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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