His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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