Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
