the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize