What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
pray to the hookup gods
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
