Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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