where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
