i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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