dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
