dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize