end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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