I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
We need a shit load of segways right now
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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