Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
