i already hear my dad disowning me
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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