have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
