..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
