i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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