How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
