dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
