guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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